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My two goals are to avoid using the parachute and not use the barf bag when he makes a left turn and the G force reaches nine times the force of gravity and my face feels numb.

Rehearsals would have been punishing even for someone who wasn’t presumably trying to navigate them while clutching a first-trimester barf bag.

There was a barf bag in the seat pocket in front of me, so I poked holes in it with a pen, put my fingers through them, and turned the bag into a puppet.

"Then I remember some bad noises coming from Bill, and a barf bag floating back from right to left," he says.

I know that for a long time, a lot of having a kid is dealing with dirty diapers, stomach flu, and accidents, and I don’t want to be perpetually holding a barf bag for several years.